Thursday, December 16, 2010

Never A Dull Moment! (12/16/10)

Last night was my company’s Christmas party, and let me just say that it should be a standard office policy or mandate of some sorts, that the day after the office party be a paid holiday.

Lordy! The evening was sure eventful!!!

We, like so many offices out there, have one particular member of the staff who just manages to rub everyone wrong, we happen to have lovingly nicknamed the woman in our office who fits that bill “Evil;” and last night she was in top form. She arrived buzzed and proceeded to get plastered. So much so she couldn’t walk to the restroom straight and proceeded to fall off the toilet.

Now, it is imperative that I mention that she and I do NOT get along whatsoever. In fact in the eight years of working here and with her, the only time she is remotely nice to me is when she needs something or is trying to work herself off of the temporary shit list with the bosses. So…. it was quite interesting when everyone who could have driven the SLOSH home managed to vacate the restaurant with impeccable speed, leaving the bosses, my husband and I, and of course… my nemesis.

So, once the bosses have managed to convince her that “yes you really are that bad,” she hands over her keys and away we go. Now on the way to the car she decides to inform me that her car is a standard, GREAT! now let me get that much more sober in a hurry! Okay, no problem I tell her as I get in and kick off my high-heel… only to discover there is no clutch! So a quick peek at the consol and its confirmed, this Honda is an automatic… oh this is going to be fun!!!

Thirty minutes (of rolling up and down windows, playing with vents and buttons, constant apologies, thank you(s) and Oh My God(s) and my favorite “Slow Down,” all while I am doing the limit in the slow lane) later, we pull into her driveway. God let her be able to walk to the front door and into her house on her own, because I DID NOT BARGAIN FOR THIS!!!

Well thankfully, and I mean seriously THANKFULLY, she made it out of the car and into her side gate just fine. Why she choose not to use the front door is beside me, I just wanted to get to my car and my husband and be homeward bound ASAP.

Lets just say…. I better have earned some major points for this and I have definitely filled my “Nice” and “Good Deeds” quota for 2010, ain’t no worry about that!

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